Funny IM/Chat Thread

[likeafox]

<Jas^o^n> van gogh
* klimt (asd@BCD3326A.C20ECEF6.254F5223.IP) has joined #DefineCynical
<Jas^o^n> klimt
<klimt> jason
<Jas^o^n> Oh hi klimt
<Jas^o^n> I was just naming famous painters
<klimt> oh.

[likeafox]

<Tai> hi5
<Arloest> (:-()/
<Tai> (:-()/\(^______^)>

[Muninn]

It was just one of theose moments.

Muffin has joined #definecynical
<Muffin> Hay
<Muninn> Who's this
Muffin has left irc.spicylemons.net (Client exited)

[MuffinSticks]

Lawl jack I thought you were talking to someone else D=

[MuffinSticks]

Cole Soderburg 22:48
I think my fatbelly is smaller from the last time I checked
Huh 22:48

Alex Kantar 22:48
Nothing like dehydration!

Cole Soderburg 22:48
Haha
I'm always dehydrated 22:49
It's a controlled variable 22:49

Alex Kantar 22:49
Nothing like... controlled variables!

Cole Soderburg 22:50
<3 those control variables

Alex Kantar 22:50
I'll control your variable.

Cole Soderburg 22:50
Do it slut
I'll induce variations in your control 22:51

Alex Kantar 22:51
Oh babby, be my unexpected outside factor.

Cole Soderburg 22:52
I'd contaminate your irrefutable factors all night long

Alex Kantar 22:52
I think you win. :3

Cole Soderburg 22:52
Spread that data table wide
What do I win 22:52

Alex Kantar 22:53
A (^^^)

(^^^) is a shark on facebook chat. Quite a sexy shark, too.

[likeafox]

Liz: As some of you may know, me and Jason aren't really the drinkers. Well, the past couple of nights we've been drinking and tonight we've decided to actually attempt to get drunk. We wanted to share a snipit of something that made us laugh hysterically while drunk. Here you go:

Jason: we were looking at the sky, at a planet, and I say "Is that a planet" because Liz has better eyesight than I do so I reason that she would be able to identify it better. She says "I don't know it's dancing too much to tell". I say "Well if I squint, it looks like a planet". And she responds by saying, "Well, if I squint too, it stops dancing as much. It's definitely a planet. But when I look at it with wide eyes it jiggles like, side to side" and she does this exaggerated side to side motion with her hand. I say "Well that sounds like a bad sign". And then she responds with, "No. That sounds like a GREAT sign". I say, "Okay, so what does it MEAN?". and she says, "It means it wants to PARTY." We rofl.

We are still rofling.

[Arloest]

Drunk indeed!

[nickspoon]

You rascals.

[osprey]

Oh you kids nowadays and your planetary raves.

[Burning Sheep Productions]

OK, so let me get this life thing sorted out. Basically, there's a lot of people...and they walk around shopping centres a lot and drive their cars around everywhere...and that's basically the world? Is there anything more I need to know?

[Muninn]

Sometimes they exchange bodily fluids.

[Æron]

Sometimes they exchange bodily fluids.

What do they do? Poke multiple people with the same unwashed olive fork?

[Æron]

[5:42pm] nickspoon: The SI unit is a Jesus, which is enough miracle to feed 5,000 people with a fish and a loaf of bread.
[5:43pm] nickspoon: A millijesus will feed five people with a fish and a loaf of bread, or turn 125ml of water into wine.
[5:44pm] Muninn: And if you had read the Infancy Gospel of Thomas you'd know there are better miracles
[5:44pm] nickspoon: You need roughly a kilojesus to blow up the moon. Any questions?
[5:45pm] Muninn: Your ideas are like barnacles on a keel
[5:45pm] Muninn: Unwanted, ugly, a hindrance
[5:46pm] nickspoon: Muninn: You, sir, are a heathen and a Philistine.
[5:48pm] Muninn: Nickspoon - You are a vagabond of the highest degree, beggars and thieves cross the street to not be seen with you!
[5:48pm] nickspoon: Muninn: I will have you know that I associate with the highest of beggars and thieves!
[5:48pm] Muninn: Yes verily, in the treasury no doubt
[5:49pm] Muninn: We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones, such as yourself, to public office do we not?
[5:51pm] nickspoon: Your biting satirical notions are not lost on me, good sir, but I shall have you know that Her Majesty's Government takes none too kindly to such wantons as yourself.
[5:52pm] Muninn: I dare say you would know a fair bit about such qualities sir, having practised them to elbow your way in a safe spot
[5:53pm] Muninn: But your accusations are as unfounded as men trying to seek a non-existent northwest passage
[5:56pm] nickspoon: Truth, sir, is always inferior to oration in sophisticated society; a justice of truth is a justice of those uncivilised inhabitants of the Eastern continents and such like.
[5:56pm] nickspoon: I think you will agree that we may aspire to greater merits than truth.
[5:59pm] Muninn: But we aspire to many things and fine oratorical prowess is used by every learned man to aid him in his endevour, it is a means therefore to higher stations and not merely oration for the sake of a pleasently crafted speech to tickle the fickle fancy of fanatics of the opposite camp
[6:02pm] nickspoon: I am afraid that your oration proves hollow, for as you are a man, so you are one to tickle fancies and indeed have your own fancies tickled in a veritable multitude of ways.
[6:04pm] Muninn: I think what my lackluster collegue is hinting at is that tickling certain fancies of his is a feat best left to the confines of his private quarters
[6:05pm] Muninn: It is a shame that he must degenerate our talk with such puerile and unsavory tactics of speech which aid no one and merely show the inadequacy of his upbringing and intelligence
[6:08pm] nickspoon: So at last we reveal the true nature of your ambitions; yet in your attempts to smear my fine countenance in the eyes of my colleagues and countrymen you have revealed to any man of intelligence that those trysts of which you so rashly accuse me are precisely those in which the honourable gentleman would be inclined to engage
[6:08pm] Muninn: No doubt he felt the audience would sway to his means, he must believe you mere children or fools to imagine his tactless and spindly arguments could ever convince even the mere gibbering idiot on the streets shouting about some mad scheme
[6:10pm] nickspoon: And with these words the honourable gentleman shows his ideas worthy of the gibbering idiot himself, for it is only the fool who could see sense in his insanities.
[6:10pm] Muninn: If I have revealed anything it is that your public image of the well respected gentleman is a mere facade to an underlying miasma of thievery, obscenity, simple-mindedness and caddishness
[6:12pm] Muninn: And while you seek to astound in so many words you end up saying nothing but sink eve more into the pit of lies and half-truths you craft out of the very same weapons that the highwayman or -dare I say - Spaniard have in their arsenal
[6:13pm] nickspoon: These words so filled with malice and yet with the air of uncertainty, for you are fully aware that those charges you bring against my innocent person are those which any jury of right-thinking men would hold against yourself.
[6:14pm] nickspoon: And sir, all here can see quite plainly that you are much more a Spaniard than I.
[6:14pm] Muninn: If there is any flavour to the air it is your quickening descent into the maelstrom of anxiety and fear
[6:16pm] nickspoon: And yet I stand before you and lay bare the fullness of my mind without so much as a twitch; surely a man so fully confident of his own perceptions can see that it is not I who is anxious, nor is it I who fears the truth.
[6:17pm] Muninn: They will have to search the very base and filthy environments of the land to find one person who will be saddened to see the back of you sir
[6:19pm] Muninn: Your supposed knowledge of my perceptions show your grave mistakes on judging the human condition when faced with a man of truly high stature
[6:20pm] nickspoon: Is it not said that it is the beggar who knows the most unblemished truth? If those filthy environments of which you speak are distant from men such as yourself who seek to only to corrupt Her Majesty's fair country then exile me hence!
[6:22pm] Muninn: You who substitute verbosity for fine oratory since you have not the skill or the knowledge to carry a truly well constructed response in brevity
[6:24pm] Muninn: I need not exile anyone such as you to places such, for in the eyes of all gathered your true companions have been revealed and by everything shown exile is not something one can impose on someone who already enjoys the surroundings he is sent to
[6:25pm] nickspoon: The honourable gentleman engages not only in debauchery and falsehoods, but hypocrisy also? Ought he be fit to govern at all, let alone at the height of office in which he desires to find himself?
[6:27pm] Muninn: My aspirations are not yours to debate sir, better men than you have tried to hinder me and they have all been sent to the colonies after I exposed their web of illegal dealings
[6:30pm] Muninn: Speak up sir, your mumbling incoherently to yourself betrays your inadequate character
[6:31pm] nickspoon: You may hold the dishonourable judges in your bulging pockets, sir, but you cannot fool those shrewd men of the press and the bench; to allow many an honourable fellow to fall to your devious schemes is the most vile of all your vileness!
[6:33pm] nickspoon: Better to mumble to oneself than to boldly and thoughtlessly pronounce falsehoods, as the honourable gentleman appears so inclined to do.
[6:34pm] Muninn: The fine gentlemen mistakes me, a humble servant of the Queen, as one likened to himself, a slave to his master - money, and no one else, as all men who riddle the workings of the treasury with their stretched purses are
[6:37pm] nickspoon: Evidently the honourable gentleman wishes us all to forget his well-publicised and extensive dealings with outlaws and smugglers of every depraved sort, and perhaps also to turn a blind eye to his aspirations to hide his own operations in Her Majesty's treasury.
[6:38pm] Muninn: My good sir, perhaps you had to miss your morning meal, for your head seems in such a daze and confusion that you are recounting your own sordid practices and endevours as if they were mine
[6:40pm] nickspoon: So quick you are to place the blame on another! Truly you are a viper disguised as a gentleman.
[6:40pm] nickspoon: This honourable gentleman must be getting to bed now, or else he shall be tired come the morning.
[6:41pm] Muninn: And what beast of nature might you be sir? A hyena? Laughing to the passing crowds while butchering a poor animal?
[6:41pm] Muninn: But all is said it seems, good night and fare thee well sir!
[6:41pm] nickspoon: I bid you goodnight, in the hope that I shall not wake to find my throat cut by those vagabonds whose company you keep!
[6:41pm] Muninn: Even in farewells, such bitter words
[6:42pm] Muninn: Truly a mark of the knave

[Muninn]

Reading through that, it strikes me even more how wicked and slanderous Nickspoon's words were, and if they had an inkling of truth they might actually have hurt me.

[nickspoon]

Reading through that, it strikes me even more how wicked and slanderous Nickspoon's words were, and if they had an inkling of truth they might actually have hurt me.

Oh don't you start that again.