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Posted: Sun Mar 30, 2008 2:41 am
by Tom Flapwell
I knew of the euphemistic slang meaning of "drop a bomb," but...

Posted: Fri Apr 04, 2008 3:57 pm
by VisibilityMissing
Circles survives, gets court protection . . .
Apr 4, 7:06 AM EDT

Fowl Play Prompts Unusual Court Order

CENTRAL ISLIP, N.Y. (AP) -- A court has issued what could be at least a local first: an order of protection for a duck.

A Suffolk County judge approved the measure Thursday, telling a man accused of shooting a family's pet duck to stay away from the bird and her owners.

Suffolk County Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals Chief Roy Gross says he can't recall a previous court case involving cruelty to a duck.

Owner Janet Lippincott says a group of young people bounded over her backyard fence and swarmed the yellow-billed Peking duck with pellet guns on March 17. The bird, named Circles, has recovered after a bullet pierced her voice box.

The 21-year-old suspect pleaded not guilty Thursday to felony animal cruelty charges.
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Wait, is that a guitar in your pants?
Apr 3, 6:36 PM EDT

Man Steals Guitar by Placing It in Pants

LEWISTON, Maine (AP) -- Police are searching for a man accused of shoving an electric guitar in his pants and walking out of a store in Lewiston, Maine.

Police say the theft occurred last week and they're looking for three men. One of the men shoved a Fender Stratocaster in his pants and pulled a sweatshirt over the top. The other two acted as lookouts.

All three can be seen on footage from video surveillance.

Strangely enough, the music shop has seen the method before. A man did the same thing in 2006 but was caught as he tried to walk out.

Posted: Sat Apr 05, 2008 6:57 pm
by rabid_fox

Posted: Sun Apr 06, 2008 8:22 pm
by Baconsticks
Mr. T brought boy out of coma
Former The A-Team star Mr. T once stunned a sick child's family by bringing him out of a coma - after doctors begged the actor for help.
(Advertisement)

The poorly kid fell unconscious in Detroit, Michigan in the mid-1980s - and the only physical movement he made was in response to hearing Mr. T's name.

And when the mohawked star was in town, he stopped by the hospital to visit the ill boy - with miraculous results.

He tells Empire magazine, "His family put toys around him and one of them was a Mr. T doll. And whenever my name came up, the boy moved his arm.

"Somebody told the doctors I was in town, so they called me down there. I closed the curtains and prayed. Then, as I was walking down the hall, the kid suddenly came out of the coma and hollered out.

"That was my supernatural moment."
holy shit.

Posted: Mon Apr 07, 2008 7:17 pm
by Tom Flapwell
Chuck Norris's tears are said to cure cancer, but can his presence cure comas?

Posted: Mon Apr 07, 2008 11:37 pm
by VisibilityMissing
Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night nor demented turkeys stay these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds . . .
Postal workers attacked by wild turkeys

MADISON, Wis. - Rather than rain or snow, or even dogs, postal workers in a West Side neighborhood near Owen Conservation Park are being pestered by wild turkeys this spring. Mara Wilhite, manager of the Hilldale Station Post Office, said she expected to deal with all manner of issues when she went to work for the U.S. Post Office. But that was not one of them.

"Just when you thought you'd heard it all," she said.

About five to 10 of the birds have been pecking at the postal workers as they make their rounds, and some of the birds have attacked the letter carriers with the sharp spurs on their legs. One of the birds went through the open door of a mail truck and scratched the driver.

Wilhite sought help in the matter from Eric Lobner, regional wildlife program supervisor for the state Department of Natural Resources.

Lobner said the behavior is clearly tied to the breeding season, which started recently and runs through about mid-May.

Color plays an important role in turkey breeding, he said, with the color of the male's head during mating season changes from gaudy blue to white to red. Lobner speculated that perhaps the turkeys are attracted to the red, white and blue postal trucks.

Postal workers were armed with water pistols. But Lober said that, while the squirts of water worked for a while, the turkeys now seem accustomed to it.

Some workers have been using long sticks to fend off the birds, he said, adding that he will meet with Wilhite next week to discuss other possible solutions.

Part of the problem, Lobner said, is that residents around Owen Conservation Park around the Parkwood Hills neighborhood may be feeding the turkeys, which makes the birds less afraid of humans. He said pamphlets have been circulated in the neighborhood to discourage people from feeding the birds.

___

Information from: Wisconsin State Journal, http://www.madison.com/wsj
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This thief isn't getting enough natural mellowing agents . . .
Thief breaks into 'ketchup' railcar

GALESBURG, Ill. - Police called to investigate a theft at a private railyard in Galesburg encountered a gory-looking scene when they climbed into the burglarized railcar, but it wasn't blood. It was ketchup — a lot of ketchup.

The officers were called to the rail parking facility behind the Railroad Refrigeration Services plant Saturday night after an employee found that one railcar had been forced open. But the car wasn't filled with liquor, prime meat or any of the other usual targets of such thefts. Instead, it was filled with containers of ketchup.

Police said the thief didn't appear to have stolen any of the ketchup, but had — in apparent frustration — squirted some of it all over the inside of the car.

Posted: Mon Apr 21, 2008 2:52 pm
by Tai
Vis may appreciate this one ^__^

http://www.adn.com/news/alaska/story/380134.html
Gov. Sarah Palin gave birth to her fifth child at 6:30 this morning at Mat-Su Regional Medical Center, her spokeswoman said today.

The boy's name is Trig Paxson Van Palin. He's 6 pounds, 2 ounces.

"The governor's labor began while she was in Texas, and I do know that she got on a plane and landed in Anchorage late last night," said Palin spokeswoman Sharon Leighow.

Leighow said the governor and her son are healthy and resting comfortably today.

The babby wasn't due until May 18. "It was quite a surprise," Leighow said.

Palin and her husband, Todd, had been in Texas since Tuesday for a Republican Governors Association convention, Leighow said.

The Palin family issued a statement that read: "Trig is beautiful and already adored by us. We knew through early testing he would face special challenges, and we feel privileged that God would entrust us with this gift and allow us unspeakable joy as he entered our lives.

"We have faith that every babby is created for good purpose and has potential to make this world a better place. We are truly blessed."

Asked what special challenges the family was referring to, Leighow said, "It's a family matter, and that information should come from the governor herself."

Like the rest of Alaskans, Leighow said, she learned the babby's name today.

She said she'll have to find out where "Trig" came from. As for "Paxson," Leighow said that Todd Palin -- a hard-core snowmachiner who has won multiple Iron Dog races -- said it related to the tiny Alaska community of Paxson north of Glennallen, a favorite destination of snowmachiners.

Both the parents "think it's a beautiful part of the state," Leighow said.

Earlier this year, Palin joked to a Daily News reporter that "we've always liked the middle name Van because, you know, growing up in the '80s, Van Palin would be a really cool name."
[/quote]

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 12:25 pm
by CodeCat
Haha, van isn't a name. It's a Dutch preposition meaning 'of' or 'from'.

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 3:06 pm
by Tom Flapwell
Haha, van isn't a name. It's a Dutch preposition meaning 'of' or 'from'.
It's also a nickname for Vincent or Giovanni.

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 4:14 pm
by Rooster
A van is also a truck, but smaller.

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 5:33 pm
by VisibilityMissing
Well, I think that she named him that because she expects him to live in one, possibly down by the river. . .

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 10:13 pm
by Hyperion

Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 10:39 pm
by CodeCat
It's also a nickname for Vincent or Giovanni.
Yes but if they named him after the group Van Halen, it's certainly Dutch.

Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2008 1:57 am
by osprey
Well, I think that she named him that because she expects him to live in one, possibly down by the river. . .
THERE'LL BE PLENTY OF TIME TO LIVE IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER.....WHEN YOU'RE LIVING IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER!!!!

Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2008 2:14 am
by VisibilityMissing
Well, I think that she named him that because she expects him to live in one, possibly down by the river. . .
THERE'LL BE PLENTY OF TIME TO LIVE IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER.....WHEN YOU'RE LIVING IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER!!!!
Hey, I didn't say it :P

Living in vans is a fine Alaskan tradition, on par with spam recipes and duct tape . . .