Weird News

VisibilityMissing · Postby **VisibilityMissing** » Tue Sep 20, 2005 12:04 am

Arrrr! Have a jolly <a href='http://www.talklikeapirate.com/piratehome.html' target='_blank'>Talk Like A Pirate Day,</a> ye swabs!  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Psychopaths could be best financial traders? Mon Sep 19, 2:45 PM ET LONDON (Reuters) - "Wanted: psychopaths to make a killing in the markets." Such an advert will not be appearing in the world's newspapers any time soon, but it may have a ring of truth after research revealed the best wheeler-dealers could well be "functional psychopaths." A team of U.S. scientists has found the emotionally impaired are more willing to gamble for high stakes and that people with brain damage may make good financial decisions, the Times newspaper reported Monday. In a study of investors' behavior 41 people with normal IQs were asked to play a simple investment game. Fifteen of the group had suffered lesions on the areas of the brain that affect emotions. The result was those with brain damage outperformed those without. The scientists found emotions led some of the group to avoid risks even when the potential benefits far outweighed the losses, a phenomenon known as myopic loss aversion. One of the researchers, Antione Bechara, an associate professor of neurology at the University of Iowa, said the best stock market investors might plausibly be called "functional psychopaths." Fellow author, Baba Shiv of Stanford Graduate School of Business said many company chiefs and top lawyers may also show they share the same trait. "Emotions serve an adaptive role in speeding up the decision-making process," said Shiv. "However, there are circumstances in which a naturally occurring emotional response must be inhibited, so that a deliberate and potentially wiser decision can be made." The study, published in June in the journal Psychological Science, was conducted by a team of researchers from Stanford University, Carnegie Mellon University, and the University of Iowa. </td></tr></table>

Rooster · Postby **Rooster** » Tue Sep 20, 2005 1:42 am

<table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> MASTERCARD wedding story - You just have to love this guy This is a true story about a recent wedding that took place at Clemson University. It was in the local newspaper and even Jay Leno mentioned it on his show. It was a huge wedding with about 300 guests. After the wedding at the reception, the groom got up on stage with a microphone to talk to the crowd. He said he wanted to thank everyone for coming, many from long distances, to support them at their wedding. He especially wanted to thank the bride's and his family and to thank his new father-in-law for providing such a lavish reception. As a token of his deep appreciation he said he wanted to give everyone a special gift just from him. So taped to the bottom of everyone's chair, including the wedding party, was a manila envelope. He said this was his gift to everyone, and asked them to open their envelope. Inside each manila envelope was an 8x10 glossy of his bride having sex with the best man. The groom had gotten suspicious of them weeks earlier and had hired a private detective to tail them. After just standing there, just watching the guests' reactions for a couple of minutes, he turned to the best man and said, "F--- you!". Then he turned to his bride and said, "F--- you!". Then he turned to the dumbfounded crowd and said, "I'm outta here." He had the marriage annulled first thing in the morning. While most people would have cancelled the wedding immediately after finding out about the affair, this guy goes through with the charade, as if nothing were wrong. His revenge...making the bride's parents pay over $32,000 for a 300 guest wedding and reception, and best of all, trashing the bride's and best man's reputations in front of 300 friends and family members. This guy has balls the size of church bells. Do you think we might get a MasterCard "priceless" commercial out of this? Elegant wedding reception for 300 family members and friends ....$32,000 Wedding photographs commemorating the occasion ..................$3,000 Deluxe two week honeymoon accommodations in Maui....................$8,500 The look on everyone's face when they saw the 8x10 glossy of the bride humping the best man ..........Priceless. There are some things money can't buy, for everything else there's Mastercard. </td></tr></table>  Nice <img src='http://definecynical.mancubus.net/forum ... ailwag.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tailwag.gif' />

Zaaphod · Postby **Zaaphod** » Wed Sep 21, 2005 12:58 am

Assuming that actually happened. It sounds urban legend-ish to me.

VisibilityMissing · Postby **VisibilityMissing** » Sat Sep 24, 2005 12:06 am

This must go here by "the chicken rule". <img src='http://definecynical.mancubus.net/forum ... tongue.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tongue.gif' />  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Police Investigate Bizarre Chicken Theft By Andrew Gorosko "It's unusual, to say the least," explained police patrol Officer Richard Robinson. Officer Robinson is investigating the overnight theft of approximately 35 chickens from a Sandy Hook chicken coop earlier this month. The stolen chickens had been kept by A.J. and Jeff Collier, a couple living off Route 34, who had raised the named animals as pets, with a sideline of selling the eggs that the hens laid. The crime occurred sometime overnight on September 9-10, Mr Collier said this week. Apparently, someone who knew that there were chickens on the property, entered the chicken coop, and then stole the birds, he said. Clearly, at least some of the birds were killed before they were taken away, Mr Collier said, noting that after the theft, six chicken's heads were found lying in the area. Only one bird was left alive. That bird has been given to a friend who raises chickens, Mr Collier said. The thief or thieves apparently parked a vehicle alongside Route 34, hopped a fence and then entered the chicken coop to steal the animals, he said. The birds may have been stolen by someone for food, or may have been stolen for use in cult practices, he said. "It's disturbing," Mr Collier said of the incident. Police were thorough in investigating the crime, Mr Collier said, noting that Officer Robinson took photographs of the scene and collected fingerprint evidence. Officer Robinson said this week that there are no suspects in the case. When he investigated the scene, he encountered the remnants of the birds in the form scattered feathers, some blood, and a chicken's head, he said. "This is unusual," he noted. "This one is bizarre, and I'm hoping that its [publicity] going to jog someone's memory" concerning any unusual activity which was witnessed in the area when the crime occurred, he said. Officer Robinson asks anyone with information about the poultry theft to contact him at the police station at 426-5841 or at 270-8888.</td></tr></table>

Tom Flapwell · Postby **Tom Flapwell** » Sat Sep 24, 2005 5:47 pm

Has it never occurred to them that the culprit could be a fox?

VisibilityMissing · Postby **VisibilityMissing** » Sat Sep 24, 2005 7:07 pm

Well, if foxes have learned to use knives we should be very, very worried . . . <img src='http://definecynical.mancubus.net/forum ... /blink.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='blink.gif' />

Caoimhin · Postby **Caoimhin** » Sun Sep 25, 2005 4:17 pm

If foxes even learned to drive we should also be worried. Then again maybe we should all sorround our house with moats. It works for Llewellyn.

rogue-kun · Postby **rogue-kun** » Sun Sep 25, 2005 5:27 pm

<table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: (Caoimhin @ Sep 25 2005, 04:17 PM)</td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> If foxes even learned to drive we should also be worried. Then again maybe we should all sorround our house with moats. It works for Llewellyn.  </td></tr></table>  Not really He have a copy of the controls to the draw bridge to a fox... well Ozy needs a way to get into his own home <img src='http://definecynical.mancubus.net/forum ... s/wink.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink.gif' />

VisibilityMissing · Postby **VisibilityMissing** » Mon Sep 26, 2005 10:48 pm

More on penguins . . .  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Gay penguin goes straight From correspondents in New York 26-09-2005 From: The Australian THE animal kingdom's most famous gay couple has split up. Silo and Roy, the cohabiting penguins of Central Park Zoo, are no longer an item. The pair rose to prominence six years ago when they came out with their same-sex relationship. Since then, they have successfully hatched and raised an adoptive chick (after an uncertain start that involved trying to incubate a rock). They blazed a trail for six other gay penguin couples at the zoo. But the affair ended when Scrappy, a new female penguin, moved into the neighbourhood and caught Silo's eye. "Silo and Roy stopped spending as much time together or building a nest," John Rowden, the zoo's head curator, told The New York Post. Silo promptly moved in with Scrappy, building a new nest with her. Zookeepers are at a loss to explain Silo's sudden conversion. </td></tr></table>

VisibilityMissing · Postby **VisibilityMissing** » Tue Sep 27, 2005 11:30 pm

Penguins and minefields: Two great things that go great together! Minefields make penguin habitat . . . <img src='http://definecynical.mancubus.net/forum ... tongue.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tongue.gif' />  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Penguins stay snug and secure in minefields KIDNEY COVE, Falkland Islands (Reuters) -- There's a mating ritual going on in the minefield. Fortunately the would-be lovers are penguins, too light to detonate the deadly mines laid more than two decades ago during a war on the far-flung Falkland Islands. Thousands of penguins and other feathered and amphibious friends choose to nest and rest in no-go zones. The British estimate that some 25,000 land mines, mostly sown by Argentine forces in the 1982 war with Britain, remain. On a recent day, the squawking penguins were busily finding partners, preparing nests and waddling about the mating grounds. Wildlife numbers in the mined areas appear to be on the rise and conservationists cannot hide their enthusiasm about this unorthodox form of protecting lands previously trampled by people or overgrazed by sheep. It is the bright spot in a long-term land mine problem -- one that is not likely to go away because de-mining is difficult, if not impossible, in the peaty soils and shifting sands of this South Atlantic archipelago. Grant Munro, director of Falklands Conservation, says the boost to wildlife is a bit anecdotal since "it has really not been looked into, for obvious reasons." "But you see an assemblage of plants in the minefields, all fenced and inspected, with no livestock inside. Vegetation has had a chance to recover," he added. 117 minefields left in islands Most of the 150 minefields were laid around the capital, Stanley, when Argentine forces landed there in April 1982 to claim the islands taken by the British in 1833. The British armed forces defeated the Argentines 10 weeks later in a war that killed 650 Argentines and 250 British. Some mines were cleared right after the conflict in a joint British-Argentine effort. Today there are 117 minefields left, 87 of them in the Stanley area where two-thirds of the islands' 2,900 people live. Stanley is also the landing point for nearly 40,000 tourists who come on cruise ships every summer to ogle the wildlife, much like the greatest of all naturalists, Charles Darwin, did in 1833-34. One of the mined areas is at Kidney Cove, a stunningly idyllic stretch of beach across from Stanley where four species of penguins -- gentoo, king, rockhopper and Magellanic -- show up every year. At the end of winter, the first 500 of 1,500 gentoo pairs begin their mating ritual at Kidney Cove after feeding in the cold waters. They waddle up from the mined beach to nesting areas among the tussock and diddle dee vegetation. One of their favorite spots is on the mined side of fences with "Danger Mines" and skull and crossbones signs. Tourists are kept on the safe side of the fence, allowing the nervous, partner-seeking penguins to forget about encroaching humans. Habitat protected "The gentoos come up on Kidney Cove and can rest there because it is in a minefield," said Adrian Lowe, who runs penguin safaris on his family farm. "It is their natural habitat. Only the minefield fences are man-made." Just a few miles outside Stanley sits Yorke Bay, a sweeping crescent beach with calm waters where locals used to swim and barbecue. As an ideal place for an amphibious landing, it was heavily mined in the war. Next door is Gypsy Cove, where experts believe mines might have washed over from Yorke Bay, forcing authorities to also fence off that area. Gypsy Cove visitors can still see Magellanic penguins, rock cormorants, black-crowned night herons and dolphins from the walkway at the top of the cliff. The nutritious tussock grass, which sheep reduced to 20 percent of its original cover, is making a comeback at Gypsy Cove. Incredibly, no civilian has died or been injured by the land mines and just one officer lost a foot in 1984 on the perimeter of a minefield. The fences were extended after that. The government and the British forces still spend a lot of time educating the population and won't hesitate to hand down hefty penalties -- 1,500 pounds ($2,670) and a year in jail -- for anyone stupid enough to jump the fences. Some tourists were caught posing for pictures on the wrong side of the fence. But Sgt. Maj. Mick Owen, who heads up the local Explosive Ordinance Disposal, calls the Falklands "the most controlled mined area in the world." Leaving things be Argentina, which puts the number of remaining mines closer to 15,000, is offering to help clear more fields to adhere to an international treaty on land mines. Falkland Islanders, however, are not pressing on the issue, and most believe it is better not to fiddle with the fields. "There is a risk that only 95 percent would be removed," said Falkland Islands Gov. Howard Pearce. "You would bring a sense of complacency to the community and increase rather than reduce the chance of injury." Besides, he noted, "The environmentalists like them." Copyright 2005 Reuters. .</td></tr></table>

VisibilityMissing · Postby **VisibilityMissing** » Wed Sep 28, 2005 2:24 pm

I think the company disclaimer at the end is the funniest part of this . . . I don't think Shakespeare comes from an infinite number of typing monkeys <img src='http://definecynical.mancubus.net/forum ... tongue.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tongue.gif' />  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>CODE </td></tr><tr><td id='CODE'> >From: [EDITED TO PROTECT THE TERMINALLY STUPID] >Sent: Thursday, September 08, 2005 1:28 PM >To: [SUCKER 1] >Subject: Pleeeeeese read and foward it's real! God Bleesed U Mari > > > >Hey, if this is real, I can sure use the money!!!! > >This was on the 9:00 o'clock news the other night and this works > > > >THIS TOOK TWO PAGES OF THE TUESDAY USATODAY - IT IS FOR REAL > > >Subject: PLEEEEEEASE READ!!!! it was on the news! > > > > >This thing is for real. Rest assured AOL and Intel will follow through >with their promises for fear of facing a multimillion-dollar class >action suit similar to the one filed by PepsiCo against General Electric >not too long ago. > > > >Dear Friends; Please do not take this for a junk letter. Bill Gates >sharing his fortune. If you ignore this, You will repent later. >Microsoft and AOL are now the largest Internet companies and in an >effort to make sure that Internet Explorer remains the most widely used >program, Microsoft and AOL are running an e-mail beta test. > > > >When you forward this e-mail to friends, Microsoft can and will track it >( If you are a Microsoft Windows user) For a two weeks time period. > > >For every person that you forward this e-mail to, Microsoft will pay you >$245.00 For every person that you sent it to that f orwards it on, >Microsoft will pay you $243.00 and ! for ever y third person that >receives it, You will be paid $241.00. Within two weeks, Microsoft will >contact you for your address and then send you a check. > >Regards. [ADDRESS REMOVED TO PROTECT POSSIBLY INNOCENT THIRD PARTY] > >I thought this was a scam myself, But two weeks after receiving this >e-mail and forwarding it on. Microsoft contacted me for my address and >within days, I receive a check for $24,800.00. You need to respond >before the beta testing is over. If anyone can afford this, Bill gates >is the man. > > >It's all marketing expense to him. Please forward this to as many people >as possib le. You are bound to get at least $10,000.00. We're not going >to help them out with their e-mail beta test without getting a little >something for our time. My brother's girlfriend got in on this a few >months ago. When I went to visit him for the Baylor/UT game. She showed >me her check. It was for the sum of $4,324.44 and was stamped "Paid in >full" > > >Like I said before, I know the law, and this is for real. > > >Intel and AOL are now discussing a merger which would make them the >largest Internet company and in an effort make sure that AOL remains the >most widely used program, Intel and AOL are running an e-mail beta test. > > > >When you forward this e-mail to friends, Intel can and will track it( if >you are a Microsoft Windows user)for a two week time period. > > >Try it; Wha! t have y ou got to lose > >__________________________________________________ >Do You Yahoo!? >Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around >http://mail.yahoo.com > >********************************** The Company reserves the right to >review all e-mail. Your sending of e-mail is consent for the Company to >review the content of your e-mail. Communicating via e-mail does not >constitute an offer of coverage. Eligibility requirements and coverages >can vary by state. Allstate coverages are subject to the policy terms, >conditions, and exclusions detailed in the insurance contract issued at >purchase. Quotations on insurance are provided as estimates and are not >an insurance contract. </td></tr></table>  REPENT! REPENT!

erikbarrett · Postby **erikbarrett** » Wed Sep 28, 2005 10:19 pm

Well, I guess that's one way to take a stand for your country.  <table border='0' align='center' width='95%' ><tr><td class='quotetop'>Quote: </td></tr><tr><td class='quotebody'> Australians do their patriotic duty - birthrate up Wed Sep 28,10:06 AM ET CANBERRA (Reuters) - Treasurer Peter Costello urged Australians to "do their patriotic duty" and have more children but it seems they were doing it anyway, just for fun. A new study shows the birth rate hitting its highest level in seven years. A study by Australian National University demographer Peter McDonald showed the country's birth rate at 1.77 per woman in 2004, its highest level since 1997. McDonald believes the rate will stay around 1.8 for the next 5-10 years. "We've been calling for policies to support work and family for several years, and also there's been a great deal of discussion about, 'if you wait too long, there's a chance that you won't have the babby'," McDonald said. "That kind of public discussion has been pretty prominent and I think that has had its effect," he said. During a budget speech in May last year, Costello urged Australians to have more children, telling couples to "have one for your husband, one for your wife and one for your country." Costello's comments came as this country of 20.3 million people struggles to deal with an aging population. The government's Productivity Commission has forecast that one in four Australians will be aged over 65 by 2045. </td></tr></table>

Zaaphod · Postby **Zaaphod** » Thu Sep 29, 2005 12:37 am

Heh. Why does this make me think of a certain Monty Python song? <img src='http://definecynical.mancubus.net/forum ... tongue.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tongue.gif' />

Miles E Traysandor · Postby **Miles E Traysandor** » Thu Sep 29, 2005 8:17 pm

If you're a Star Wars fan, you'll love the following picture, which I found on the front page of the Boston Globe's City and Region Section... Edit: I wonder if he threw a strike? <img src='http://definecynical.mancubus.net/forum ... /laugh.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='laugh.gif' />

Tom Flapwell · Postby **Tom Flapwell** » Thu Sep 29, 2005 9:21 pm

I'd say a foul ball.

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